Marriott Edgar: Всі вірші поета

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The Jubilee Sov'reign

On Jubilee Day the Ramsbottoms

Invited relations to tea,

Including young Albert's grandmother-

An awkward old . . party, was she.

She'd seen Queen Victoria's accession

And `er wedding to Albert (the Good)

But she got quite upset when young Albert

Asked `er `ow she'd got on in the Flood.

by Marriott Edgar

Balbus

I'll tell you the story of Balbus,

You know, him as builded a wall;

I'll tell you the reason he built it,

And the place where it happened an' all.

This 'ere Balbus, though only a Tackler,

Were the most enterprising of men;

He'd heard Chicken Farms were lucrative,

So he went out and purchased a hen.

by Marriott Edgar

Up'ards

'Twere getting dusk, one winter's night,

When up the clough there came in sight,

A lad who carried through the snow,

A banner with this 'ere motto…

'Uppards'

His face was glum as he did pass,

His eyes were shiny… just like glass,

And as he went upon his way,

by Marriott Edgar

George And The Dragon

I'll tell you the tale of an old country pub

As fancied itself up to date,

It had the word " Garage" wrote on t' stable door

And a petrol pump outside the gate.

The " George and the Dragon" were t' name of the pub,

And it stood in a spot wild and bleak,

Where nowt ever seemed to be passing that way

Except Carrier's cart once a week.

by Marriott Edgar

Three Ha'Pence A Foot

I'll tell you an old-fashioned story

That Grandfather used to relate,

Of a joiner and building contractor;

'Is name, it were Sam Oglethwaite.

In a shop on the banks of the Irwell,

Old Sam used to follow 'is trade,

In a place you'll have 'eard of, called Bury;

You know, where black puddings is made.

by Marriott Edgar

Canute The Great

I'll tell of Canute, King of England,

A native of Denmark was he,

His hobbies was roving and raiding

And paddling his feet in the sea.

By trade he were what's called a Viking,

Every summer he'd visit our shore,

Help himself to whatever he wanted,

And come back in the autumn for more.

by Marriott Edgar

Asparagus

Mr. Ramsbottom went to the races,

A thing as he'd ne'er done before,

And as luck always follers beginners,

Won five pounds, no-less and no-more.

He felt himself suddenly tempted

To indulge in some reckless orgee,

So he went to a caffy-a-teerer

And had a dressed crab with his tea.

by Marriott Edgar

Albert Down Under

Albert were what you'd call “thwarted”.

He had long had an ambition, which…

Were to save up and go to Australia,

The saving up that were the hitch.

He'd a red money box on the pot shelf,

A post office thing made of tin,

But with him and his Dad and the bread knife,

It never had anything in.

by Marriott Edgar

Henry The Seventh

Henry the Seventh of England

Wasn't out of the Royal top drawer,

The only connection of which he could boast,

He were King's nephew's brother-in-law.

It were after the Wars of the Roses

That he came to the front, as it were,

When on strength of his having slain Richard the Third

He put himself up as his heir.

by Marriott Edgar

Gunner Joe

I'll tell you a seafaring story,

Of a lad who won honour and fame

Wi' Nelson at Battle 'Trafalgar,

Joe Moggeridge, that were his name.

He were one of the crew of the Victory,

His job when a battle begun

Was to take cannon balls out o' basket

And shove 'em down front end o' gun.

by Marriott Edgar

The Runcorn Ferry

On the banks of the Mersey, o'er on Cheshire side,

Lies Runcorn that's best known to fame

By Transporter Bridge as takes folks over t'stream,

Or else brings them back across same.

In days afore Transporter Bridge were put up,

A ferryboat lay in the slip,

And old Ted the boatman would row folks across

At per tuppence per person per trip.

by Marriott Edgar

Queen Matilda

Henry the first, surnamed " Beauclare,"

Lost his only son William at sea,

So when Henry died it were hard to decide

Who his heir and successor should be.

There were two runners-up for the title-

His daughter Matilda was one,

And the other, a boy, known as Stephen of Blois,

His young sister Adela's son.

by Marriott Edgar